Golf Jokes from Direct Golf Tuition

One Liners

Why do golfers always carry two pairs of trousers?  In case they get a hole in one!

The only reason I play golf is to annoy my wife, she things i'm having fun.

I'm playing so poorly this year I have had to get my ball retriever re-gripped!

Where can you find one hundred doctors on the same day? On a golf course! 

Two golfers on course look over at some fishermen, one said to the other "look at those idiots fishing in the rain!"

What's the four worst words you an hear when you play golf, "Its still your turn!"

"Your problem is your not addressing the ball correctly", "Yes but ive been polite to it for long enough!"

Whats the difference between a lost golf ball and the G spot? A man will spend five minutes looking for a lost ball!

The other day I played golf and I hit two of my best balls! I stepped on a rake.

What do you call a handicapped golfer? One who has to play with his boss!